Day 16: Donate clothing

My sixteenth task in the 30 days of kindness bootcamp was to donate clothing.

It goes like this:

I gathered up some gently used clothing that I never wear and packed them into bags, in addition with some jackets my friend Chris gave to me to add to my piles (thanks Chris!!!)

The day of the drop off I called some shelters asking how their donation programs work, because I was told some shelters put the clothing in thrift stores and people have to pay for them. I didn't want that to be the case.

I found a shelter on Vancouver's Downtown Eastside and they told me to arrive at 3 p.m.

This was perfect because it gave me time to go to London Drugs to buy some food and treats that I wanted to donate to the BC SPCA.

I made it to the shelter at 3:05 p.m. and when I walked in it was incredibly busy. The woman sitting at the front counter shouted for someone to come help me with my donations and a volunteer came out of a back room.

She looked at me, looked at my bags, and said "is that stuff brand new?"

"It's gently used, but it's nice stuff, from the Gap, Old Navy, it's not junky," I explained, pretty much stammering. I was completely taken aback.

She looked at me, shrugged her shoulders, scoffed at me, sighed and said "usually this time of year we only take new stuff, but I suppose we'll take it."

At this point I am floored.

She takes me into a back room and says "let me show you what we do with gently used stuff." She opens the door and there are piles and piles and piles of bags. She takes mine, throws them on the mountain of bags and says "like I said, we usually only like to take new stuff this time of year, but thanks anyways."

I think I said "you're welcome" and walked out. I was upset. My hands were shaking, my heart was racing and I was near tears. After a brief phone call to my mother, I decided to go back and ask for my stuff back, explaining I was not confident the donations were going to make it out of that back room.

I walked in, stated my case and the woman at the front desk called for the manager of the shelter.

Next thing I know, I am being taken into a back room with the manager and the volunteer that dealt with me.

The manager was less than pleased and the volunteer apologized, saying she had been having a very bad day and took it out on me. We talked and I told her I understood, that her job must be very challenging and that I appreciate what she must go through on a daily basis.

I was then given a tour of the shelter and the manager explained how things work, especially when it comes to getting clothing donations to their guests.

I thanked her for taking the time to show me around and decided to leave my bags.

I have been debating whether to blog about this or not because I didn't want the focus to be on the initial negative response at the shelter. The focus should be how with a little bit of honest conversation and understanding, two strangers were able to come together and appreciate where the other was coming from.

Things aren't always as they appear on the surface.

I am happy I decided to go back.

Day 15: Ask someone what their dreams and aspirations are

My fifteenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to ask someone what their dreams and aspirations in life are.

The organizers of the bootcamp explained the challenge as this:

It isn’t everyday that someone walks up to you and asks you what they wish for in their life, and then listens, wholeheartedly, to your answer.  Today, remind people that they matter, that their dreams are important and that you believe in them.

I get the theory behind it, and in part, it may be true. I also feel that if someone trusts you enough to open up and share their dreams with you, that makes you more of a kindness recipient rather than a giver.

I am tweaking this one a bit because an uplifting story landed in my lap and I was grateful to hear all about it, so, as my "act of kindness" I am sharing it.

My friend Ian was selected as an ambassador for the Sunshine Foundation's Dreamlift Day. The organization arranges for kids with physical disabilities and life-threatening illnesses to be taken to Disneyland for the day.

They got to fly to California in a Tinker Bell plane, ride Pirates of the Caribbean; Indiana Jones; It's a Small World, eat churros, hang out with Goofy. Basically just submerge themselves in the magic of the Magic Kingdom.

Ian explained to me the utter joy and excitement on the kids faces and how at one point one of the team
leaders described him as "the biggest kid of all." (I wholeheartedly believe this and to picture it in my mind made my heart swell.)

He told me how the RCMP and Orange County Sheriffs were on hand to greet the group and make the kids feel like rockstars for a day. He explained that for many of these children, it was their first time going somewhere without their parents or guardians, giving them a day of independence.

He told me how when they landed at the airport, back from a whirlwind day at Disneyland, the parents/guardians of the children greeted them at the arrival gate crying with joy and appreciation.

What resonated with me the most was Ian saying "it changed my life."

I can see how it would.

To witness large groups of strangers coming together to make "dreams" come true has to have a positive impact in some way or another.

As I mentioned in the beginning of this blog, aside from passing on this wonderful story, I was more of a kindness recipient today.

But this experience, in my eyes, is the epitome of what this bootcamp is all about.

Day 14: Hug someone

My fourteenth task of the 30 days of kindness challenge was to hug someone.

As most with most tasks of this bootcamp, I figured the more the better!

I love hugging!

I posted a sign in the kitchen at work to alert my coworkers to the fact that I would be giving out FREE hugs!!

Apparently a "hug from Hayley" isn't the hot ticket Christmas item you may have thought it would be. I only got one response to my sign! Thanks Vanessa, it was a lovely hug!

Oh well, never one to be discouraged, I just started asking people "want a hug? I'm giving them away!"

I ended up hugging eight people! Kristin, Dave, Tammy, John, Denise, Bruce, Ann, and Chris!

One of my co-workers, Anita, air hugged me from across the room. I count it as a half hug. So, I guess
I ended up with 8.5 hugs. If she reads this, she knows I'm just yanking her chain.

One of my hugs even got a shout out on Twitter!

Scientists say hugging is good for us, so be sure to hug someone today!

Day 13: Bake cookies for someone

My thirteenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to bake cookies for someone.

I love baking! Unfortunately I don't do it as much as I used to because the kitchen in my new apartment is small.

The organizers of the bootcamp gave me a recipe I was supposed to bake, but being the rebel that I am, I decided to go with one of my own.

They are walnut, cranberry, sugar, cinnamon roll ups.

The recipient of my cookies was my friend Chris.

He is one of the first friends I made when I moved to Vancouver and over the past week or so he has particularly lended a friendly ear to me. So I figured this was the perfect way to thank him!

My stupid oven isn't "baking friendly"so he didn't get as many cookies as I had planned, but he still got a decent batch.

He said they were really good and seemed to appreciate the gesture :)

Day 12: Leave a big tip for someone

My twelfth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to leave a big tip for someone.

I struggled with this one because I didn't know how to complete it without seeming like I was saying "look at this big tip I left...lucky you!"

I decided to just hand a $20 bill to the person working behind the counter at a local coffee shop, Elysian Coffee.

I walked in, very nervous, and just started mumbling about spreading kindness for 30 days and handed over the $20.

The lady and man behind the counter just stood there staring at me, took the money, smiled and said "seriously?! wait, what?!"

I composed myself and explained the 30-day bootcamp and that I wanted to give them $20. Ten dollars for them and $10 for the next customers that come in to buy their drinks.

The man behind the counter threw his fist in the air and shouted "this is the most Christmassy thing of all!" This is awesome!"

The girl behind the counter smiled and said "you're awesome! This is great! You're great! Keep being great! This is so sweet!"

I told them to just have a happy holiday and started to leave.

They both yelled for me to come back and asked "can we give you a cookie? You have to let us pay it
forward!"

I felt weird taking something in return for a random act of kindness but then realized part of this challenge is to cause of chain reaction of giving, so I accepted.

The cookie was delicious (as most cookies are) but I think it was extra tasty because of what it represented.

On a side note: I found another joke someone randomly posted at my work in response to my Day 8 challenge!

Q - What happens when Santa gets taken out mid-flight by an errant gaggle of geese?
A - Rains deer!

Day 11: Post older photos of you and a friend

My eleventh task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to post older photos of friends and I.

I started looking through the photo albums I have at my place and I came across a picture of me and my
very first friend in life, Jeremy.

We have basically known each other since birth. There are five weeks that separate us; he was born first. I may have met Jeremy for my first time while I was still in the hospital. I seem to recall my mom telling me that my Auntie Shelley brought him to the hospital while I laid there waiting to come home (I was a preemie.)

You may have noticed I referred to his mom as my aunt. We aren't related by blood, but we call each other's parents "aunt and uncle."

Growing up Jer and I were attached at the hip.

From a very young age we would debate the important issues, like what the purpose of a beautiful
building in Hamilton was. We would argue in the backseat "it's a church, no it's a castle! No, it's a church! No, it's a castle!" I'll let you decide which one of us believed it was a church and which of us believed it was a castle ;)

Jer taught me how to sprint! During lunch breaks in grade three we would head to the playground where he would make me run back and forth, teaching me how to go "really fast!"

He also introduced me to one of my favorite movies to this day "Revenge of the Nerds." We were so young we needed a permission note to rent it at the video store!

Always looking out for me, there was that one time our grade three class was playing softball and the ball came flying directly at my face, causing a massive nosebleed. He came and sat in the office with me, we both ate freezies, and I eventually stopped crying.

We unfortunately don't get to speak or see each other all that often anymore; I'm in BC, he's in Ontario; I'm busy with my career and he is busy with his. But, when push comes to shove, we are there for each other.

Fast forward to present day when I flew home because one of my grandmothers had passed away. After working something like 28 hours straight (he's a doctor) he still came directly to my mother's house to sit with us. It was an incredible difficult time and I remember just wanting to see his face. He came through and it helped.

Thirty-three years and counting!

Day 10: Make a playlist for somone

My tenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to make a music playlist for someone.

I love making music playlists!!!

My favorite band in the entire world is the Dave Matthews Band and one of my favorite places in the world is the Gorge Ampitheatre where me and my friend Ian have started going every year to see DMB play Labour Day weekend.

It's pretty much our "happy place."

I decided to make a playlist for him of songs we've seen the band perform there. I figured it would be a great way for him to escape to our "happy place" whenever he wanted!



The playlist has been emailed to him but it goes like this: (in no particular order)

1. Space Between (Ian's favorite)
2. Cornbread
3. Funny the way it is
4. Jimi Thing
5. Grace is gone
6. What would you say
7. American baby
8. Pig
9. Too much
10. All along the watchtower
11. Warehouse
12. You and me
13. Everyday
14. Where are you going
15. Shake me like a monkey
16. Grey street
17. Stay (wasting time)
18. Rapunzel
19. Two step
20. Ants marching
21. If only
22. Satellite
23. Louisiana Bayou
24. Crush
25. #41
26. Gravedigger

I also made a playlist for the rest of you! It's Thursday...one more day until the weekend!

So, shake your hiney to some 90s!

A special shout out to my friend Wendy for helping me test the link! Stupid Songza doesn't allow you to listen to a playlist you create! How dumb is that?! I think pretty dumb. (Wendy, just so you know, I added your boy Marky Mark to the playlist first!)

Day 9: Tweet The Ellen Show about #30DaysofGiving

My ninth task of the 30 days of kindness challenge was to tweet The Ellen Show about the bootcamp.

I laughed when I read the task because I had somewhat already completed it. When the bootcamp started, I emailed the producers of the show on Day 3 telling them about the random acts of kindness that were taking place around the world. In my mind it just made sense; when you think of kindness, you think of Ellen!

I had only told two people that I emailed the show, my mom and my friend Chris.

We were also given the option to tweet anyone else we might think would enjoy the bootcamp and help spread the word.

I chose one of my favourite musicians, Boyd Tinsley, the violinist with the Dave Matthews Band. He's a kind, peaceful man that loves to spread love!

It's not so outrageous to think that he would get back to me; he's tweeted at me before! (I freaked out with excitement!)

I still haven't heard back from either of them, but as the wise George Michael says "Because I've got to have faith, I've got to have faith, because I've got to have faith, faith, faith."

One a side note: I see a certain 'someone' in Ontario got one of my secret handwritten letters!

AND I walked into the work kitchen area and someone had replaced a joke I had left on the microwave with a joke of their own! I was completely hoping this would happen when we were given the "post a joke in a public place" task! If whoever did this is reading my blog, thank you!! You made my day!!

Day 8: Leave a joke posted in a public place

My eighth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to leave a joke posted in a public place.

FUN!!!!

I woke up in the morning to a blanket of snow covering the ground, so it only made sense to make the jokes winter themed!

I started researching some jokes online and found six that I liked. The executive decision was made; in this case, more is better than less. I got everything prepared and off I went! You know it's going to be a good day when you leave the house armed with funny post it notes and scotch tape...

My first joke I posted outside the elevator at my apartment building.

Q - What did the seal say when it swam into a concrete wall?
A - DAM!!

I needed gas, so I decided to post my second joke on the gas pump!

Q - What do you get when you sit on the ice too long?
A - Polaroids!

Q - What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A - I have no eye deer!

The next four were randomly posted around my workplace (on the microwave, outside the mens room, outside the ladies room, and inside the ladies room.)

I didn't tell anyone what I had done.

Everyday I come into work and one of my colleague's asks "Hayley, what is today's challenge?" Day eight was no different. I just smiled and she said "I think I know. Are you the post it girl?" I just nodded. Another colleague yelled "that's you?! Awesome! I was in the bathroom and I felt so silly because I was in there laughing to myself!"

Now one for all of you!

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Freeze!
Freeze who?
Freeze a jolly good fellow! Freeze a jolly good fellow!

Day 7: Make breakfast for someone

My seventh task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to make breakfast for someone.

There are fewer things in life that I love more than making a breakfast feast for people that I know - Homemade waffles, eggs, bacon, cinnamon roll french toast (yes, you read that correctly.)

Problem is, I work Sunday mornings!

So, off to the store I went and bought a raspberry-rhubarb pie for my co-workers. I was especially excited because it had a heart cut into it! (It's the small things...)

They seemed to enjoy it. After hearing what challenge I had been given my one co-worker said "sweet!! I'm starving!!"

Another publicly thanked me on Twitter!!

The pie was delicious and I think it was the perfect way to end off the week.

Day 6: Call a long lost friend

My sixth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to call a "long lost friend."

Two people came to mind right away, so I thought "why choose??"

First I called Garett. We went to college together and aside from a few Facebook messages here and there, we haven't really spoken since graduation. We were incredibly close so I was really looking forward to this phone call. I got home from work and called him. NO ANSWER!

Alright, "no big deal," I thought. Next I called Ara.

I met Ara in 2007 when I moved to BC to work at Radio NL. Ara has a personality that is infectious. We bonded quickly over our love of music. He moved on to work in Kelowna and I followed a year later. He then moved on to Alberta and I to Vancouver. We text quite a bit but the last time I saw him was before the Jay Z/Kanye show in December 2011.

We spoke on the phone for 34 minutes, pretty much instantly going into "what the heck is wrong with Kanye?!" talk. We ended the conversation agreeing that we needed to speak again before Christmas. Ara, if you're reading this, your laugh rocks my world! Also, I told you I'd use a picture of you and I, but it's stuck in a cabinet I can't get open right now because the handle fell off....

I wasn't willing to give up on Garett. I saw he was on Facebook and told him that I had tried calling him. He told me to try again.

We hadn't spoken in more than seven years!! It seemed like just yesterday we were sitting at me place watching movies, going out, and just hanging out. We caught up on our personal and professional lives, talked sports, and had a good laugh about the one time we met Elliotte Friedman (I always told Garett he reminded me of Elliotte Friedman.)

I loved today's challenge. It forced me to reach out to people I think of more often than they know.

It's a great day! I learned a very valuable lesson. If you make a TRUE bond with someone, distance and time can't kill it, it'll always be there.

Day 5: Take someone to the movies

My fifth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge involved me taking someone to the movies.

Sounds easy, right? Not so much.

I made a few calls and everyone was either busy working or at holiday parties. I considered taking myself to the movies, but to be honest, I didn't feel like sitting in a theatre.

So I went to a movie theatre close to my apartment and stood outside. My plan was to find someone and buy them a movie ticket. The suggestion actually came from my mother (thanks mom!)

Two teenage girls walked up to the box office and ordered tickets for Catching Fire. I explained to them and the ticket teller that I was participating in the 30 days of kindness bootcamp and that I would like to buy them their tickets for the movie. They stood there looking at me like I was crazy for a few seconds but then realized I was serious and said "this is so cool! Thank you!!"

I also passed along my favorite movie theatre "snack tip." Put your Milk Duds IN your popcorn so they get a little soft. It's the perfect mix of salty and sweet! Trust me, don't diss it until you try it!

I then went home and watched my favorite holiday movies "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" and "The Holiday."

Day 4: Create a secret handshake with a friend

My fourth task in the 30-day kindness challenge was to create a secret handshake with a friend.

I thought it would be nice to reach out to some friends that live away from me and have a "virtual secret handshake." (I suppose it's not so secret now...)

Thankfully I have the friends that I do and they jumped right on board!

I emailed them a video of me doing our secret "handshake" and they sent me videos in return of them doing the same thing.

It took me awhile to edit, but it was TOTALLY worth it! I laughed and smiled through the entire process! I especially enjoyed how much they seemed to love participating too! The kindness bug is spreading!! Best of all, now we have this ridiculous video as a keepsake :)

I hope they, and you, love the end result as much as I do!

I present to you "The Long Distance Secret Handshake!"

Day 3: Mail a handwritten letter to someone

My task for the third day of the 30-day kindness challenge involved me writing a handwritten letter to someone and mailing it to them.

I decided the recipient of my letter should be someone who I haven't had much contact with over the past year or so, especially through text messaging and/or Facebook.

It took only a couple of minutes before my favorite teacher popped into my head. He was one of my college instructors while I was going through school to become a broadcast journalist and he was AMAZING! Jim was always supportive, kind, patient, and funny. He and I developed a very nice bond over my three years in school and we kept in contact even when I moved from Ontario to BC.

Unfortunately, life gets busy and distance does its thing and we haven't spoken in awhile.

So, I put my pen to paper and wrote him! It was important to me to use the opportunity that had
presented itself and make the letter mean something. I didn't want it to just be a "Hey! How's it going?" So instead, I focused on how he has positively impacted my life, expressing gratitude.

Well, once I finished that letter, I had to send another...it just felt that good!

The recipient of that letter will remain a secret. (They may read this and I want it to be a surprise!)

I can honestly say that I am getting way more in return from this "kindness bootcamp" than what I am giving. The response from my family, friends, co-workers, even strangers has been overwhelming and I am finding myself walking around with a goofy grin on my face since it started. In fact, a woman whom I have never met reached out to me on Facebook yesterday and told me that my blog has inspired her to start her own! You can read it here.

PS: This particular challenge made me realize how bad my handwriting has gotten. I used to have the nicest handwriting! I'm not going to lie, I went through a couple drafts of my letter until I felt it looked OK to send.

PPS: I discovered there is a mailbox right by my apartment! I had always driven around looking for
one! BONUS!

Day 2: Give a coffee to a stranger

My second task in the 30-day kindness challenge was to give a coffee to a stranger.

A few options ran through my mind. The first, pay for the coffee of the person standing in line behind me at the coffee shop. The second, go buy coffees for the Vancouver Police Department or SPCA.

I decided against buying drinks for the VPD or SPCA because (as sad as it is) in this day in age I wasn't sure if they would just throw the coffees out, thinking I was trying to drug or poison them.

It was very chilly in Vancouver, so as I was walking to work I decided I was going to buy a warm drink for someone that looked like they needed it.

Unlike the challenge from the day before, I was pretty comfortable with this one. In fact, doing something like this is my go-to strategy after I've reported on a particularly difficult story. The last time that comes to mind is the mass shooting at Sandy Hook. I woke up the next day, made a donation at a shelter and handed out coffees to some people sitting on Robson St. The "acts of kindness" help me deal with what comes from reporting such terrible tragedies. I suppose giving can be selfish.

Anyways, back to the task. I grabbed my highly trained cameraman and we hit the street! The man that accepted my hot chocolate (yes, I broke the rules and decided against coffee) said "Thank you! You have a nice day!" 

I gave a second hot chocolate to one of my co-workers who later told me "Hayley, this hot chocolate you bought me is warming my soul!"

This kindness bootcamp has only just begun and I am already having the best time! As soon as I complete my challenge I can't wait to get my next one! It's addictive!

Day 1: Give a high five to a stranger

My task to start off the 30-day kindness challenge was the one I was looking forward to the most, give a high five to a complete stranger.

Oddly enough, as much I was looking forward to it, I was nervous! I couldn't figure out how I was supposed to just walk up to a complete stranger and high five them.

I figured it was best to just announce my intention right off the bat.

I walked to the corner just outside my work and looked for the perfect person, who eventually found me!

I was standing there on a very busy street corner holding my sign and it surprised me how many people just passed me, not taking me up on my offer for a "free high five." Then this guy came walking towards me with a huge grin and the deed was done!

He asked the obvious question "why are you standing on the street giving away high fives?" and I explained it was part of my challenge to spread kindness this month. He told me I was "awesome" and we parted with "you have an awesome day!" (So much awesome talk.)

All-in-all, I would say it was a great way to kick-off the Bootcamp!