Day 16: Donate clothing

My sixteenth task in the 30 days of kindness bootcamp was to donate clothing.

It goes like this:

I gathered up some gently used clothing that I never wear and packed them into bags, in addition with some jackets my friend Chris gave to me to add to my piles (thanks Chris!!!)

The day of the drop off I called some shelters asking how their donation programs work, because I was told some shelters put the clothing in thrift stores and people have to pay for them. I didn't want that to be the case.

I found a shelter on Vancouver's Downtown Eastside and they told me to arrive at 3 p.m.

This was perfect because it gave me time to go to London Drugs to buy some food and treats that I wanted to donate to the BC SPCA.

I made it to the shelter at 3:05 p.m. and when I walked in it was incredibly busy. The woman sitting at the front counter shouted for someone to come help me with my donations and a volunteer came out of a back room.

She looked at me, looked at my bags, and said "is that stuff brand new?"

"It's gently used, but it's nice stuff, from the Gap, Old Navy, it's not junky," I explained, pretty much stammering. I was completely taken aback.

She looked at me, shrugged her shoulders, scoffed at me, sighed and said "usually this time of year we only take new stuff, but I suppose we'll take it."

At this point I am floored.

She takes me into a back room and says "let me show you what we do with gently used stuff." She opens the door and there are piles and piles and piles of bags. She takes mine, throws them on the mountain of bags and says "like I said, we usually only like to take new stuff this time of year, but thanks anyways."

I think I said "you're welcome" and walked out. I was upset. My hands were shaking, my heart was racing and I was near tears. After a brief phone call to my mother, I decided to go back and ask for my stuff back, explaining I was not confident the donations were going to make it out of that back room.

I walked in, stated my case and the woman at the front desk called for the manager of the shelter.

Next thing I know, I am being taken into a back room with the manager and the volunteer that dealt with me.

The manager was less than pleased and the volunteer apologized, saying she had been having a very bad day and took it out on me. We talked and I told her I understood, that her job must be very challenging and that I appreciate what she must go through on a daily basis.

I was then given a tour of the shelter and the manager explained how things work, especially when it comes to getting clothing donations to their guests.

I thanked her for taking the time to show me around and decided to leave my bags.

I have been debating whether to blog about this or not because I didn't want the focus to be on the initial negative response at the shelter. The focus should be how with a little bit of honest conversation and understanding, two strangers were able to come together and appreciate where the other was coming from.

Things aren't always as they appear on the surface.

I am happy I decided to go back.

Day 15: Ask someone what their dreams and aspirations are

My fifteenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to ask someone what their dreams and aspirations in life are.

The organizers of the bootcamp explained the challenge as this:

It isn’t everyday that someone walks up to you and asks you what they wish for in their life, and then listens, wholeheartedly, to your answer.  Today, remind people that they matter, that their dreams are important and that you believe in them.

I get the theory behind it, and in part, it may be true. I also feel that if someone trusts you enough to open up and share their dreams with you, that makes you more of a kindness recipient rather than a giver.

I am tweaking this one a bit because an uplifting story landed in my lap and I was grateful to hear all about it, so, as my "act of kindness" I am sharing it.

My friend Ian was selected as an ambassador for the Sunshine Foundation's Dreamlift Day. The organization arranges for kids with physical disabilities and life-threatening illnesses to be taken to Disneyland for the day.

They got to fly to California in a Tinker Bell plane, ride Pirates of the Caribbean; Indiana Jones; It's a Small World, eat churros, hang out with Goofy. Basically just submerge themselves in the magic of the Magic Kingdom.

Ian explained to me the utter joy and excitement on the kids faces and how at one point one of the team
leaders described him as "the biggest kid of all." (I wholeheartedly believe this and to picture it in my mind made my heart swell.)

He told me how the RCMP and Orange County Sheriffs were on hand to greet the group and make the kids feel like rockstars for a day. He explained that for many of these children, it was their first time going somewhere without their parents or guardians, giving them a day of independence.

He told me how when they landed at the airport, back from a whirlwind day at Disneyland, the parents/guardians of the children greeted them at the arrival gate crying with joy and appreciation.

What resonated with me the most was Ian saying "it changed my life."

I can see how it would.

To witness large groups of strangers coming together to make "dreams" come true has to have a positive impact in some way or another.

As I mentioned in the beginning of this blog, aside from passing on this wonderful story, I was more of a kindness recipient today.

But this experience, in my eyes, is the epitome of what this bootcamp is all about.

Day 14: Hug someone

My fourteenth task of the 30 days of kindness challenge was to hug someone.

As most with most tasks of this bootcamp, I figured the more the better!

I love hugging!

I posted a sign in the kitchen at work to alert my coworkers to the fact that I would be giving out FREE hugs!!

Apparently a "hug from Hayley" isn't the hot ticket Christmas item you may have thought it would be. I only got one response to my sign! Thanks Vanessa, it was a lovely hug!

Oh well, never one to be discouraged, I just started asking people "want a hug? I'm giving them away!"

I ended up hugging eight people! Kristin, Dave, Tammy, John, Denise, Bruce, Ann, and Chris!

One of my co-workers, Anita, air hugged me from across the room. I count it as a half hug. So, I guess
I ended up with 8.5 hugs. If she reads this, she knows I'm just yanking her chain.

One of my hugs even got a shout out on Twitter!

Scientists say hugging is good for us, so be sure to hug someone today!

Day 13: Bake cookies for someone

My thirteenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to bake cookies for someone.

I love baking! Unfortunately I don't do it as much as I used to because the kitchen in my new apartment is small.

The organizers of the bootcamp gave me a recipe I was supposed to bake, but being the rebel that I am, I decided to go with one of my own.

They are walnut, cranberry, sugar, cinnamon roll ups.

The recipient of my cookies was my friend Chris.

He is one of the first friends I made when I moved to Vancouver and over the past week or so he has particularly lended a friendly ear to me. So I figured this was the perfect way to thank him!

My stupid oven isn't "baking friendly"so he didn't get as many cookies as I had planned, but he still got a decent batch.

He said they were really good and seemed to appreciate the gesture :)

Day 12: Leave a big tip for someone

My twelfth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to leave a big tip for someone.

I struggled with this one because I didn't know how to complete it without seeming like I was saying "look at this big tip I left...lucky you!"

I decided to just hand a $20 bill to the person working behind the counter at a local coffee shop, Elysian Coffee.

I walked in, very nervous, and just started mumbling about spreading kindness for 30 days and handed over the $20.

The lady and man behind the counter just stood there staring at me, took the money, smiled and said "seriously?! wait, what?!"

I composed myself and explained the 30-day bootcamp and that I wanted to give them $20. Ten dollars for them and $10 for the next customers that come in to buy their drinks.

The man behind the counter threw his fist in the air and shouted "this is the most Christmassy thing of all!" This is awesome!"

The girl behind the counter smiled and said "you're awesome! This is great! You're great! Keep being great! This is so sweet!"

I told them to just have a happy holiday and started to leave.

They both yelled for me to come back and asked "can we give you a cookie? You have to let us pay it
forward!"

I felt weird taking something in return for a random act of kindness but then realized part of this challenge is to cause of chain reaction of giving, so I accepted.

The cookie was delicious (as most cookies are) but I think it was extra tasty because of what it represented.

On a side note: I found another joke someone randomly posted at my work in response to my Day 8 challenge!

Q - What happens when Santa gets taken out mid-flight by an errant gaggle of geese?
A - Rains deer!

Day 11: Post older photos of you and a friend

My eleventh task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to post older photos of friends and I.

I started looking through the photo albums I have at my place and I came across a picture of me and my
very first friend in life, Jeremy.

We have basically known each other since birth. There are five weeks that separate us; he was born first. I may have met Jeremy for my first time while I was still in the hospital. I seem to recall my mom telling me that my Auntie Shelley brought him to the hospital while I laid there waiting to come home (I was a preemie.)

You may have noticed I referred to his mom as my aunt. We aren't related by blood, but we call each other's parents "aunt and uncle."

Growing up Jer and I were attached at the hip.

From a very young age we would debate the important issues, like what the purpose of a beautiful
building in Hamilton was. We would argue in the backseat "it's a church, no it's a castle! No, it's a church! No, it's a castle!" I'll let you decide which one of us believed it was a church and which of us believed it was a castle ;)

Jer taught me how to sprint! During lunch breaks in grade three we would head to the playground where he would make me run back and forth, teaching me how to go "really fast!"

He also introduced me to one of my favorite movies to this day "Revenge of the Nerds." We were so young we needed a permission note to rent it at the video store!

Always looking out for me, there was that one time our grade three class was playing softball and the ball came flying directly at my face, causing a massive nosebleed. He came and sat in the office with me, we both ate freezies, and I eventually stopped crying.

We unfortunately don't get to speak or see each other all that often anymore; I'm in BC, he's in Ontario; I'm busy with my career and he is busy with his. But, when push comes to shove, we are there for each other.

Fast forward to present day when I flew home because one of my grandmothers had passed away. After working something like 28 hours straight (he's a doctor) he still came directly to my mother's house to sit with us. It was an incredible difficult time and I remember just wanting to see his face. He came through and it helped.

Thirty-three years and counting!

Day 10: Make a playlist for somone

My tenth task in the 30 days of kindness challenge was to make a music playlist for someone.

I love making music playlists!!!

My favorite band in the entire world is the Dave Matthews Band and one of my favorite places in the world is the Gorge Ampitheatre where me and my friend Ian have started going every year to see DMB play Labour Day weekend.

It's pretty much our "happy place."

I decided to make a playlist for him of songs we've seen the band perform there. I figured it would be a great way for him to escape to our "happy place" whenever he wanted!



The playlist has been emailed to him but it goes like this: (in no particular order)

1. Space Between (Ian's favorite)
2. Cornbread
3. Funny the way it is
4. Jimi Thing
5. Grace is gone
6. What would you say
7. American baby
8. Pig
9. Too much
10. All along the watchtower
11. Warehouse
12. You and me
13. Everyday
14. Where are you going
15. Shake me like a monkey
16. Grey street
17. Stay (wasting time)
18. Rapunzel
19. Two step
20. Ants marching
21. If only
22. Satellite
23. Louisiana Bayou
24. Crush
25. #41
26. Gravedigger

I also made a playlist for the rest of you! It's Thursday...one more day until the weekend!

So, shake your hiney to some 90s!

A special shout out to my friend Wendy for helping me test the link! Stupid Songza doesn't allow you to listen to a playlist you create! How dumb is that?! I think pretty dumb. (Wendy, just so you know, I added your boy Marky Mark to the playlist first!)